Post a Joke Thread - Page 8

**bazzer** · #**141** 31-08-2010, 09:58 PM

ye i know, your wifes cooking is get worse

**adam_ayres1988** · #**142** 31-08-2010, 10:00 PM

Bubbly personality = Fat

**mfc1876** · #**143** 31-08-2010, 10:12 PM

Wacky = Fucking Psycho
Caring = Bunny Boiler

**WKR Man** · #**144** 31-08-2010, 10:43 PM

Sky Sports breaking news!

Pakistan have won next year's ICC World Cup.

**barry69922898** · #**145** 31-08-2010, 11:12 PM

A man came home from work, sat down in his favourite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick! Bring me a beer before it starts!"

She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer.

When he finished it, he said, "Quick! Bring me another beer! It's gonna start!"

This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer.

When it was gone, he said, "Quickly! Another beer! It's gonna start any second!"

"That's it!" She blows her top. "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave! Don't you realise that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?"

The husband sighed. "Oh shit. It's started."

**Begbie** · #**146** 31-08-2010, 11:48 PM

I'm advertising = I'm desperate
Will provide an alibi = I'm very desperate

**Begbie** · #**147** 01-09-2010, 12:32 AM

Scottish lonely-hearts. Copied from another thread, I think Kubla is to blame.

:

**imperial109** · #**148** 01-09-2010, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mfc1876

I thought the wife would be an ideal candidate for a new TV show being advertised. However looking at it again it's actually called 'Fact Hunt'.

I thought the wife was named on a loaf of bread the other day, but it actual said Thick Cut!

**mfc1876** · #**149** 01-09-2010, 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by imperial109

I thought the wife was named on a loaf of bread the other day, but it actual said Thick Cut!

Ha ha ha class!!!

**ruudboy** · #**150** 01-09-2010, 08:43 PM

Keep 'em coming lads.

**barry69922898** · #**151** 02-09-2010, 02:39 PM

How do you get a fat bird into bed? Piece of cake....

**bazzer** · #**152** 02-09-2010, 02:43 PM

Guys we like a joke we have a joke thread here-Forums>The Pub>Post a Joke - please post jokes in the thread ,Thanks

Edit: All shifted into the Joke Thread.

**evertone** · #**153** 05-09-2010, 11:32 AM

Bought a dog off a blacksmith today..As soon as i got it home ,the bloody thing made a bolt for the door !.

**deadlywill** · #**154** 05-09-2010, 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by evertone

Bought a dog off a blacksmith today..As soon as i got it home ,the bloody thing made a bolt for the door !.

like that one mate

**evertone** · #**155** 06-09-2010, 10:30 AM

Paddy stumbles across a mass baptism at a river..He walks in to the river and stands next to the preacher.
"Are you ready to find jesus my son?"
Paddy says "i am sir".The preacher puts him under the water then says "Have you found jesus ?" "No sir.
He puts him under for longer
"Have you found jesus?" "No sir"
He puts him under for two minutes "Have you found jesus?".
Paddy says"Are you fecking sure this is where he fell in?".

**goodison** · #**156** 06-09-2010, 11:56 AM

One for the parents:

Little girl: Daddy, where does Poo come from?

Daddy, after thinking carefully about the question replies: Well honey, every time we eat something, our tummy takes out all the good things and throws away all the bad things. The bad things are what come out as poo.

The little girl thinks about what her daddy just said ... nods slowly, then quizzingly asks: Ok daddy .. then where does Tigger come from?

**evertone** · #**157** 06-09-2010, 12:52 PM

I said to the wife in bed "give us a chilean miner would you darling".
She said "whats that?"
I said "go to the bottom of me shaft and stay there till fecking christmas!.

**Begbie** · #**158** 06-09-2010, 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by evertone

I said to the wife in bed "give us a chilean miner would you darling".
She said "whats that?"
I said "go to the bottom of me shaft and stay there till fecking christmas!.

Like it.

**bazzer** · #**159** 06-09-2010, 01:24 PM

Rooney had a terrible World Cup ,so he spent �1200 to score
Crouch was asked what he would be if he was not a pro footballer
A virgin he replied

**barry69922898** · #**160** 06-09-2010, 01:51 PM

Apparently, Alex Ferguson had an 80's car themed party for his players.

Giggs arrived in a Cavalier, Scholes in a Sierra..... and Rooney chose to come in an Escort.